Lead with Heart, Not Ego Let’s be honest: stepping up as a leader can feel like walking into a battlefield. But what happens when someone else on your team also wants the top spot? Suddenly, it’s not just about proving yourself to the group; it’s about navigating the delicate dance of ambition, collaboration, and respect.

I’ve been there. It’s tough, messy, and at times, it feels personal. But here’s the truth: leadership isn’t about crushing competition. It’s about inspiring people, including that colleague who might have wanted the role just as much as you. The question is: are you ready to lead with integrity and make the journey one that elevates everyone? Let’s dive in.
1. Leadership Starts Within Before you step into a leadership role, ask yourself: Why do I want this? If your answer revolves around titles, power, or proving something to others, pause. True leadership isn’t about you; it’s about the people you serve.
What to Do:
- Reflect on your strengths and how they can benefit your team.
- Identify areas where you need growth and actively work on them.
- Keep your ego in check. A leader’s goal is to elevate the whole team, not just themselves.
Pro Tip: Be vulnerable. Admit when you don’t know something and show your willingness to learn. It’s not weakness; it’s humanity.
2. See the Colleague as an Ally, Not a Rival It’s easy to view someone vying for the same role as a threat. Resist that urge. Instead, recognize that their ambition means they care about the team just as much as you do. That’s a strength, not a problem.
How to Build Bridges:
- Have an open conversation. Acknowledge their aspirations and share your vision for collaboration.
- Offer them a stake in the team’s success. Delegate responsibilities that align with their strengths.
- Celebrate their wins publicly. Leaders who lift others inspire loyalty and respect.
Real Talk: Leadership isn’t about hoarding authority. It’s about empowering others, even those who might have wanted your job.
3. Lead by Example, Not by Dictating Actions speak louder than words, and your team will watch how you handle this dynamic with your colleague. If they see you undermining or competing, you’ve already lost their respect.
Ways to Walk the Talk:
- Stay professional, even in tough moments. Emotional intelligence is key.
- Be transparent. Share your decisions and the reasoning behind them.
- Show up consistently. A leader’s reliability sets the tone for the entire team.
Example: If your colleague comes up with a great idea, give them credit—and mean it. Your team will see your generosity as a sign of true leadership.
4. Focus on Vision, Not Validation It’s tempting to try and prove yourself at every turn, especially with another ambitious colleague in the mix. But true leaders focus on the bigger picture: the team’s goals and how to achieve them.
Tips for Staying Vision-Oriented:
- Involve the team in goal-setting. When people feel ownership, they’re more invested.
- Stay solution-focused. Challenges will arise; your job is to guide the team through them.
- Keep your eye on long-term success, not short-term wins.
Mindset Shift: You’re not here to win a popularity contest. You’re here to create impact.
5. Embrace the Power of Collaboration Here’s the kicker: a team with two strong leaders isn’t a bad thing. In fact, it can be a massive advantage if handled correctly. By aligning with your colleague, you’re doubling the leadership potential on your team.
What This Looks Like:
- Co-create strategies and share responsibilities.
- Lean on their expertise in areas where they excel.
- Use their insights as a sounding board for your own ideas.
Example: Think of yourself as co-pilots, each steering the plane in the same direction but using your unique strengths to get there.
Conclusion: Leadership is a Team Effort Becoming a leader isn’t about dominating; it’s about elevating. It’s about creating a space where your team thrives and your colleague-turned-ally feels valued. When you lead with empathy, collaboration, and a vision bigger than yourself, you don’t just gain a title—you gain respect, trust, and a legacy worth remembering.
So, step up. Embrace the challenge. And show everyone—including that ambitious colleague—what true leadership looks like.
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